Monday, January 23, 2012

funny quotes on life


The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left.  ~Jerry M. Wright



Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes.  ~Gloria Naylor



Never raise your hand to your kids.  It leaves your groin unprotected.  ~Red Buttons




Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier.  ~Dan Bennett




Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life.  ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities



A father is always making his baby into a little woman.  And when she is a woman he turns her back again.  ~Enid Bagnold




A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun.  Enjoy the trip.  ~Author Unknown



Father! - to God himself we cannot give a holier name.  ~William Wordsworth

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  • Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act.  ~Truman Capote

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  • When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened.  It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it.  ~Mark Twain
    I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich.  ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
    When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around.  But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.  ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)

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  • May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown


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